How to Cope with Sleep Deprivation During the Newborn Stage – Especially for New Parents

If it’s your first baby, the newborn stage hits differently.

Not because it’s objectively harder than the second or third, but because everything is new. You’re not experienced. You don’t know what you’re doing. You’re constantly second-guessing yourself. And to top it all off, you’re sleep-deprived.

There were times I genuinely worried:
Am I doing this right?
Is the baby still alive?!

And if you’re having your baby in your late 30s or 40s, like I did, the exhaustion hits harder. Your body just doesn’t bounce back the same way. Sleep deprivation becomes not just a nuisance but a deep, physical burden that’s hard to recover from.

I wish I could say I glided through the newborn phase gracefully. But truthfully? I barely made it.

And yet—I did. And so will you.

The good news is This Stage Will End!

Yes, this is temporary. And yes, you will sleep again. But when you’re in the thick of it, that doesn’t help much.

So what actually does help?

Here are a few things that helped me cope, and sometimes even thrive, while running on fumes.

4 Tips on Surviving Lack of Sleep During Newborn Stage

1. You Need Help!

Say it louder for the first-time moms in the back: You can’t do this alone.

You just delivered a baby. Your body needs recovery. Your emotions are fragile. And you’re responsible for a tiny, round-the-clock human.

You need help.

Let it be your spouse, grandparents, church family, a friend dropping off a meal. All of it counts. And all of it matters.

Have a strategy with your spouse:

• When can he take over so you can sleep for a few hours?
• Can him do the laundry, run the dishwasher, or prep a bottle at night?

You need sleep to function. I found that when I was able to get enough sleep, everything changed. I could think clearly, feel emotionally stable, and actually enjoy motherhood.

If that means skipping a night feed, or letting your spouse use formula or heat up breast milk, do it. There is no gold medal for being the most self-sacrificing zombie. A well-rested mom is a better mom.

2. Let Go of Perfection

This is the survival stage. Your house might be messy. The dishes might pile up. That’s okay.

The hardest part for me was waking up multiple times a night, every night, to feed and change the baby. Especially after having my second child in my late 30s, it took a deeper toll on my body and mind.

If you and your spouse can take turns at night, do it. If that means letting them do one bottle or formula feeding or night diaper change, that’s not failure, it’s strategy.

And if you need to give up pumping for one night so you can get solid sleep? That’s not selfish. That’s smart.

I actually stopped breastfeeding at 6 months with my second baby. He was biting. My milk supply was declining. But he grew perfectly fine and healthy!

3. Get Outside

One of the simplest things that helped me was just getting outside.

Even if I was dragging, I’d put baby in the stroller and step out for a short walk. The sunlight helped reset my mood, and it also helped my baby start to develop natural melatonin patterns, which can support longer sleep stretches at night.

Even 10–15 minutes of sunshine can feel like a mental reset. It doesn’t fix everything, but it softens the edge of exhaustion.

4. Take One Day at a Time

I read all the comments online that said, “Moms remember this will end! It doesn’t last! ”
And while I knew that was true… in the moment, it didn’t help me.

What did help?
Not looking too far ahead. Not thinking about “how many more months of this.”
Just focusing on today.

It’s like hiking up a steep mountain, if you keep looking at the peak, it’s overwhelming. But if you keep your eyes on your next step, you stay grounded.

If you’re really at your breaking point, talk to your spouse, your family, your doctor. Even a 20-minute nap can change everything.

Final Memo: What I Know Now

I miss those newborn moments.

Yes, it was so hard in the moment. But now I look back and wish I had let go of the little things, like obsessing over breastfeeding or stressing about never using formula.

With my second baby, I did better. I had more perspective. But I also had an older child needing me too, which added a whole new layer of tired.

Looking back, how I fed the baby, how clean the house was… those things felt huge at the time. But in the scope of raising a whole human? They’re small.

I would rather have enjoyed the moment than been consumed by trying to get it “right.”

Sleep helps with that. So does grace.
Give yourself both.

“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.”
— Isaiah 40:29

Whether it’s your first or your fourth, God sees your struggle. Ask Him to sustain you when you can’t see straight. Ask Him to multiply the little rest you do get. Ask Him to give you wisdom on all things.

Because He will.